My unconditional love for a land and for its soldiers made me write this poem… enjoy reading:

I’ll steal two minutes of your precious moment;

Read the story about the truth,

Maybe you ungrateful badasses will change your view!

We are the men

The ones who saw agony

we will tell our story, this is what we live for and die in glory!

In the nights when you lie down in your cuddly bed, in your beautiful night clothes, 

Some of the so called “men” wear their culottes, 

But we wait in front, scared to death: no, we don’t fear to lose life nor money,

We pray Almighty for mercy.

It is the precious life of a comarad 

Who has to face the ugly blade, the enemies blade…

In this never ending war – which is our arcade! 

Don’t cry my proud mother!

I am here for the country given us from father! 

Ready to sacrifice 

Even without thinking twice

Everything what I have


No cold- no hot.

Only one weather

There is our holy GOD!

In  prayers,

When we stay ready to die, to defend our boarders!

We are hindu, muslim, christ and more

There is nothing what can separate us

We are one, we are a body

Our love for Bharat is the real glory. 

You will never have an idea

How it is being me,

In this war- where is no time for plea…

In earth our families will get the Medaillon of HONOR cause we proofed generosity.

In this world which lost his soul and humanity.



My life

Mybe I was powerless as Kid,

But now,

I am a self-confident woman.

So darling this means: 

I won’t allow you to enter my world! You will stay outside, you will go to hell; the only place you deserve.


Dear reader, 

If someone caused you an unbearable pain in your life and like my example a trauma in your childhood, then shot the fucker down! 

He doesn’t have any rights to see you, hearing your words and thoughts or contact you on whatsapp or any social media. BLOCK HIM!

Be strong and set your own rules of happiness! Because you aren’t that helpless kid anymore. 


My Girl

You think superman is a hero? You don’t know my girl….

Look at her, how tired she is but still smiles to her mummy…. 

she is my real inspiration-my life line. 

She never disappoints me, never betray me or miss to love me back…

In all my 29years, she is the only thing in my life, about I can say “such a masterpiece of mine! “

She walked with me today many tiridng kilometers to hosp, city council and long bus drivings… she sweated, she stumbled, she slept and woke up. Always looking into my eyes, always ready to cheer her anxious mummy who fails to integrate herself in society.

Now this small angel is ready to accompany me to India… 

Every mum loves her child Nisam, but You my baby… you are my only friend. It doesn’t matter if you are three years old, you are smarter then many other persons I know and you understand me. We don’t need words to share our thoughts… you see from my face what I try to tell and you react immediately. Mummy cries right now cause she loves you, too UNCONDITIONALLY….

You are my amendment from God, for my broken life. 

Thank you for your unconditional love.

For accepting me. Accepting me LITERALLY.

I don’t want to die not because I fear death or love the life, but I fear to miss a single moment with you. My precious one. 

So I fight.

In love, your Anne 


My random thoughts:

1. I am not too fat, my clothes are just too tight.

2. public officers serves us, we don’t have to praise them like gods!

3. burocraceay in Turkey is like cleaning home while a toddler is present : too much work for nothing

4. My shyness caused me walking 5km to city council instead of traveling by bus.

5. I hate mosquitoes.

6. My expectations from inappropriate people will cause one day a heart attack.

7. MRI first time experienced yesterday; and I literally cried cause felt lonley and scared (I am 29πŸ˜’)

8. I have doubts if it was right decision to plan my trip to India without guide. So difficult everything and feel lonley… too much responsibility on my shoulders.

9. How the hell I am supposed to find indian embassy on Tuesday?!

10. I need a hug…. 


Forget it

How u can save a broken relationship? 

By noursing it.

There is no other way.

My hindi-teacher was invited by me to german dinner at my home. My teacher was very eager to taste food from Germany and I wanted fill his wish. It is very different then turkish delicacy. 

My mum and I cooked for hours in the kitchen and experimented together. 

We only cooked and enjoyed when we tasted with our fingertips the delicious food … we forgot the differences between us and were for that moment only a normal mummy&daughter duo in all the chaos between steam and pots… when I got tired she cheered me up and offered me coffee; when she felt exhausted I massaged her shoulders… in the end, Rashid-Ji (my teacher) was amazed and thanked mum and me in a very lovely way. 

And I?

I’ve got one of most precious memory with my mum… I’ve created my own happiness with her in our destroyed relationship.

thank you mum.  β€οΈ



It was a beautiful day,

Because I decided so.

As the happiness of my life depended on the quality of my thoughts.

I can remember with closed eyes and a marvelous smile on my face – who I WAS.

And suddenly,

I felt the change.

My cells did.

My heart did.

My soul felt it.

I knew that the rules changed.

I’ve rose from dead, back to me and knew nothing will be the same anymore.

Hello Life πŸ€


(Pic credits:

Lionheart 🦁 

My guard is rearmed.

My heart is starched.

My demons are banned.

My fears doused.

Test my will life!

Dare me!

Show me your sword death , so I can smirk at you in triumph , 

Because nothing can conquer this lionheart!

Dedicated to my lifeline.

My little brother❀️

Are You Lonely ?

loneliness is not staying physically alone in one room.

Loneliness is when you don’t have anyone

who appreciates your thoughts, who enjoys listening to you.

Real loneliness begins in your mind…till it poisons your heart and finally kills your Soul.



My IPhone.

The broken screen of my phone, the silver color of its backside… 

nobody knows that I hug my phone to fall asleep, that I kiss it with my tears to calm my bursting heart.

They don’t know and never will… that I see your eyes when I am lost in darkness and watch the screen with empty eyes…


I hear your voice in the melody of the sweetest sound of music;And that I FEEL YOU every time when I touch my phone…

Silently I will carry this secret with me; why I do all this.


One lovely Blog award

I ve screenshot your name, but I can’t find it. If you read this please contact me and screw my ass to be that careless :/ Thank you dear….


Rules: Thank person who nominate you- give a link to their blog- they must include rules and image of award- 7 facts about yourself.- nominate 15  people


Yea, she/he wrote questions, so have to reply them πŸ™‚

1.Question: What is your biggest dream?

visit India, meet my soul mate, visit Mekkah

2.What is the most funny incident ever happened to you?

too embarrassing πŸ˜€

3. Question: What advice you want to give to readers about life experience?

Fake it until you make it

4. Question: What is your quote?

  • Not mine but I love it :”KARMA IS A BITCH IF YOU ARE ONE”

5. Question: Tell me the place where you want to go before you die?

  • Mekkah

6. What is your biggest fear?

-To loose Nisam.

7. Which is your favorite cartoon character?

  • Gumball

8. What are the qualities which make you unique in this writing blog?

  • (in my normal routine life) I am strong in writing comments :))

9. Do you believe in the law of attraction?

  • the only bond between humans nowadays, unfortunately.

10.Do you have psychic powers?

  •  am master in patience

11. Tell me a quote/line which motivates you the most?



7 facts about me

  1. I love driving car.
  2. I love going to cinema.
  3. I love popcorn.
  4. I love being invited for dinner.
  5. I Love swimming.
  6. I love my little brother.
  7. I love my soul mate.